You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
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