SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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