so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
