that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
