Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize