Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
