i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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