Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
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