You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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