yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Randomize
