You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
