Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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