Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Randomize
