you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
I'm sobbing to NWA
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
