Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
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