It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Randomize