Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
Randomize
