Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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