brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
I smell like Dick and happiness
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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