He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize
