My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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