So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
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