I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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