How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
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