yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
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