The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
