So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Randomize
