lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize
