She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
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