whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
