the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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