Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
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