lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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