we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
Your cock deserves a montage
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
