You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Randomize
