did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Randomize
