Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
