Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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