Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
Randomize
