you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
