i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Randomize
