do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Randomize
