would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
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