I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Randomize
