love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
