HIV tests are more positive than that guy
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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