dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
Randomize
