one two three fourrrrnication!
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
