You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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