Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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