You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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