i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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