I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
Randomize